J & D's Blog

Expectations and their management

We all come to matters with our predetermined set of ideas of what's right.  In our minds it's how things should be. Weddings can be a hot bed for high (unrealistic?) expectations. For example, let's use a bride and groom hiring a wedding photographer. 

They both come with a differing set of expectations. Seems natural given that most men HATE getting their pictures taken and the women LOVE it, as long as they look wonderful.  Men look great in their suits 99.9% of the time. Those jackets give them the desired shape, regardless of their actual one. Women however, succumb to other factors and make choices that are not always in their best interest. Someone should have been more honest with them during shopping. Brides need to consider their curvy bridesmaids will look better and feel happier in a dress that enhances their best features. 

So if the bride has an EXPECTATION all her girls will be in the same strapless dress (!), and look fantastic for pictures, regardless of bodyshape, guess who will be disappointed with the outcome. Poof! Fairytail images ruined. 

Expectations can be vetted and probed to ensure the best outcome possible. Our advice for those hiring wedding photographers is to communicate your expectation! If you don't, it's almost guaranteed there will be utter disappointment with the results. Use Pinterest to collect images that you love and show them to your photographer. At least they will get an idea of what you love.

Now comes the photographer expectations part. I would personally love it if everyone in the bridal party was happy. And loved the bride and groom overflowing with gushy emotion. Is this expectation realistic? Of course not! Check your expectations at the door, please.

So how do we rectify the problem? Well Albert Ellis would ask us to have no expectations therefore, achieve happiness. We say communication is key to managing hopes, dreams and their outcomes. Talk to us. We are really good listeners.